Ni Hao are you in China right now?!

Thursday, July 21, 2011 (2:10pm EST)

“Bing! It is now safe to use your electronic devices.”

I can’t help but snatch up my laptop as if someone might beat me to it and begin spilling out my reflections, emotions, expectations, fears, and hopes for the new chapter in my life.

As I clenched on to those I love for one last goodbye, I could not help but face the reality that I am, in fact, moving to China. I hugged each of them, wringing out their tears as they rolled down their cheeks. I had to settle for the one last “I love you” and know that is all that I can say to assure both them and myself, that I will take them in my hearts as I embark on this wild ride. I turned and walked toward the escalator, it hit me – shock, departure, love, fear, and sadness. And the only thought I can reflect on is, “How did this happen?”

It was an evening in late May, and my sister, Jess and I were sitting on my living room couch in Eastern Market ready to chat over my next life move.  Over the course of my past year, it had become clear that the school in which I was teaching was not a good fit for me and that I needed to seek out some new opportunities. Having been unemployed for some of the first few months out of college, I was adamant over making sure that this will never happen again.  After Jess toured me through the websites of different schools that she had heard rave reviews, we sat back on the couch and looked at one another. Hesitantly, Jess said, “ So, I kind of don’t want to tell you this, because I know you might actually consider this as a possibility, but I guess now I’ve started so now I have to…” One of her colleges in the Washington, DC region of Teach for America (TFA) was moving to Teach for All’s network partner, Teach for China to help lead training and programming. She continued by saying that this colleague was looking for Program Managers and that she thought I was definitely qualified to apply for the position.

She explained that a few years ago, Wendy Kopp the founder of Teach for America, started receiving requests from organizations in other countries to assist, guide, and offer resources to help effectively implement the TFA model in their own country. At the time, TFA had to respond by saying that they did not have that allocated in their budget and long term plans. After popular demand over the following few years, Wendy Kopp created the Teach for All network. This network supports and allows countries across the globe that are interested in using the Teach for America model to have access to guidance, resources, and each other. An organization in China was one of the first countries to jump on board. Three years ago they joined the Teach for All network and changed their name to Teach for China. Teach for China is unique amongst the other countries (for many reasons of course, by primarily) because they specially requested as many top American graduates to come teach English there as possible, rather than the traditional model which would draw upon the top achieving college graduates in the country it is servicing. Apparently China is very concerned about its students’ ability to communicate in English fluently and effectively going into the future. Per request, Teach for All is helping Teach for China recruit these smart, eager, young Americans to move to China for 2 years of service as a teacher or  “fellow” in Teach for China. Teach for China does also recruit top Chinese graduates as well who will teach a range of subject content areas. However, the ratio of American to Chinese fellows is at least 2:1. Program Managers, the position being recruited for, serve as instructional coaches for a group of teachers and help them achieve their classroom achievement goals (exactly the same as the TFA model).

I grinned at Jess and said, “Sure, why not? Send me her email.” (Thinking, “ I would rather move to rural China for the next two years than be unemployed… and it sounds like an awesome job!”). That night I emailed her former colleague. Within an hour, the woman responded and was eager to set up a time to talk about the organization and position. Over the next four weeks we exchanged many correspondences as I completed the numerous steps it took to complete the Teach for China application process. I also was applying to many other schools in DC, including the ones Jess had recommended that same evening. Two wonderful DC charter schools offered me jobs, both of which I would have been eager and excited to start in the fall. In fact, I had plans to go in and sign my contract with one of them if I had not heard back from Teach for China by July 5.  Under the fireworks the night of July 4, I got a buzz on my phone with an email for a job as Program Manager for Teach for China.

It was the moment I had been both eagerly waiting for and dreading at the same time. For the past two year I have been so fortunate to found myself in such a wonderful life. I lived in my favorite part of the city, Eastern Market, in a gorgeous newly renovated town house just three blocks away from my sister (and two metros!)  I lived happily with two old friends from college and had a nice new Prius. I had finally graduated my first two very challenging years of teaching; accumulating a boat-load of experience, knowledge, skills, and techniques for teaching Kindergarten – not to mention 25 boxes worth of teaching supplies! Going into a third year of teaching Kindergarten in DC would have finally been comfortable, manageable, and enjoyable. Rural China on the other hand….?

So what do I do? Lead this perfect life I worked so hard to create for myself in DC, or hop the next 20 hour flight to rural China and embark on what will probably be the most terrifying and challenging experience of my life. Luckily I surround myself with insanely supportive and brilliant people, all who could not let me pass up the opportunity; reminding me that not only is this a personal experience of a lifetime, but that this will also help launch my career in educational leadership.

I was immediately notified that I was a late hire and that Teach for China actually wanted me to arrive a month ago, so it would be great if I could get there yesterday. After speaking with my family and friends, July 21 was the best day for me to leave. I had 17 days to sell everything I own and pack the rest of my life up in a storage cube, cancel my ties with every organization I am affiliated with and say my last goodbyes. Immediately Jess and her husband, Jon jumped on board and hosted a fantastic going away party for me. My cousin, Jimmy and his family so graciously drove their truck out from the middle of Virginia to help move everything into storage. My mother booked her flight out to spend my final 3 days with me before I left the country. My boyfriend, Merdim finally booked the camping trip we had been talking about going on and every other friend that I have made it a point to say goodbye at least three times.

After the chaos of packing, storing, and last minute shopping was over, I was able to sit down to my relaxing and scrumptious last (vegan) supper with my mom, Jess, Jon, and Merdim. Being able to reminisce and enjoy them before I left was the best way that I could have spent my last night in DC.

With all of my emotions stirring inside of me, I walked down the escalator and into the massive TSA line. After an hour and fifteen minutes (!!!!???) of waiting to be screened, I was 15 minutes away from my flight gate closing – and they ask me to step aside so they can pat me down. THE GIRL IN THE ELASTIC OUTFIT!? No joke, I am wearing a red camisole tank top with black spandex running pants and sandals. Really, friends? Enraged, and yet knowing that they find absolutely NO sympathy, I had no choice but to dive into the Confucian Zen I am about to embody in Yunnan Province and then run like a soldier carrying 100lbs of ammo to the further possible gate as soon as the woman said, “OK, you are clear to leave.” Panting as though I might actually keel over and not make it on my flight out of exhaustion, I stumble up as they were closing the gate for Final Boarding. Holy smokes!!

Once I was able to catch my breath, I opened my bag to read the incredible gift assembled by my family.  At dinner last night, I received a book of pictures and notes from my close friends and family showing appreciation, wishing me good luck, and offering me pearls of wisdom. For those of you who were able to contribute, I cannot tell you how much you all mean to me and how thankful I am for your kindness and support.

One piece of advice stood out amongst the rest to me as very powerful and necessary, “Create a vision for what is driving you in this work- who you are and why you are here- and what you hope to achieve- and come back to it, reflect on it often, and adjust course if necessary. Be and stay grounded in your ultimate vision. “

This reminded me of my Philosophy of Education statement that I was required to write upon graduating the School of Education at BU. It was my first statement to define my mission and instructional compass in the classroom.  It is time for a vision as I leave my role in front of the classroom in the US.

Off I go now, to create a statement to articulate my vision in hope that it will act as a pillar in this extraordinary and challenging journey while I experience a Range of Change – not only within myself, but within cultures, perspectives, societies, and education across countries.